I have written a few times about my recent interviews. Spoiler alert… I did not get offered the position. But, that is not what this is really about.
We often value the outcomes. In today’s education world the outcomes seem to generate more interest than anything. We analyze test data, we pour over portfolios, and we concern ourselves with how it turns out. I have even been guilty of it myself, just a few posts ago I was reflecting on the question of “How was your interview?” thinking, I won’t know until I find out if I got the job! How narrow a vision I had of my own experience!
No, the outcome was not what I was going for in this case. I really did want this job, it seemed perfect. But, now that I can step back and think about it, the process was far more important for me. Walking in the door for my first interview, I felt fortunate to have gotten the call. I tried to convince myself that I was confident, but in reality, I did not know if I really belonged at that table. As I talked more, I experienced a change. As the interview went along, I felt different than before. Not only did I belong at that table, but I was good. I felt strongly about my answers and I was being myself, not some canned version of a person I hoped they would like.
Going into interview two, I felt like a different person. I was confident, comfortable, and ready to sit down and showcase myself. Interviews are a weird thing. It is difficult to convince several perfect strangers that they need you above all else to move in the right direction. Leaving that interview I was so calm, and felt so strongly about what I had done.
Not getting the job was an huge disappointment, not because I want a job, but because I felt great about the people I met who worked with the district. Each person I spoke with gave me reason to believe that this was a great place to be. But, though the outcome has value, this time, the process was beyond valuable. I now feel ready. If and when the next call comes, I have no doubt I will be ready. I will be able to walk into that room, sit with whoever is there, and find out if that is the right place. I am comfortable in my own skin as an administrative candidate, and I feel completely ready to own my words and face up to the challenge a new position might offer.
I am thankful for the process. I am thankful that despite the outcome, I have had the support of amazing people around me both in person and digitally, to help me come to some of these realizations. The process has changed me, and for that I am grateful!